i love me n its tym to move on..!!

8 december-i remb it for long tym..

yeah..smthing extremely hrilling happened wid me on 8 dec,d thing i couldn"t except even in mah dreamz....dat i heard my gf voice after one semester in engg terms...oh she called me...even when i woke up in d morning i was having doubt dat i talk to har in d night...at 1.30 am in d night i put a alarm in my cell of 2.20 as i was having severe headache..n took a crocin bt 1.50 a bell rang on my roomie mobile n it was her..my headache ..did i mention it..i thing i couldn"t mention a trace of it...atleast we talk abt 1 n a half hour....at d end she said she won"t come back..it was sad but it was ok...i did wrong to her ..n when she gave me d last 5 mins to say what i want to..i don"t want to say..or i was having too much to say dat i could not say anything in dat period..i only want to say thank u to her after so many dayz she called me..atleast she remb me n whole lot of things dat we did together in kota..n i really miss her..n hey sur i cant hate u..i jst love u n will alwayz do it...u r mah best buddy n will alwayz be..

jaaniya..ohh jaaniya..

Dil sunta hai, teri sadaa
Aa ru ba ru, ab toh zara
Bechain si, meri zindagi
Sunn kar teri, yeh dastaan
Jeena mera aasan kar, tu mil ke yeh ehsaan kar
Kahin kho gaya chain oh sukoon, tere dard ko ab jaan kar
Jaaniya o jaaniya, bas roye dil mera
Aasu palkon pe nahin hai bewajah
Dil hai gum zyadaa jaaniya

Tujhe paa liya ya kho diya
Iss baat par, dil ro diya
Ke chaah kar, tu naa aa sakey
Tu waqt hai, guzra hua
Tujhe rakh liya, inn yaadon ne
Ik phool sa, kitaabon mein
Iss dil mein tu, rahega sadaa
Aur mehkega, inn saanson mein
Raaton mein tu jal jaata hai
Chehre mein tu dhal jaata hai
Taara hai tu mujh mein toota sa
Neendhon se jaga deta hai
Palkon ko bhigo deta hai
Dariya hai tu mujh mein dooba sa
Har waqt khwaabon ki tarah, tu aata raha
Jaaniya o jaaniya, din kya raat kya
Aahat ho koi, lagta hai sadaa
Ke tu hai wahan jaaniya
Jaaniya o jaaniya, bas roye dil mera
Aasu palkon pe nahin hai bewajah
Dil hai gum zyadaa jaaniya

akhiri alvida..!!

Dhadkane khamosh hai 
Kuch kehti nahi 
Yeh Akhari Alvida na ho 
Chahte ankhon se Behti rahi
Yeh Akhari Alvida na ho 

Is dard ko dil mein 
Dil mein rehne do 
Jo kauf hai Ankhon se
Ankhon se kehne do 
Dukh ki Nadi chup chap Behne do 

Jo kehna hai tum dheere se keh do
Yeh Akhari Alvida na ho 

Sab yaadeein jo bandhe the Bandhan
Kajal bhi diya haathon mein kangan
Mehki rehti thi menhdi 
Gata rehta tha saawan
Phir yaadho ko sapno mein rehne do

Yeh Akhari Alvida na ho 

Dhadkane khamosh hai 
Kuch kehti nahi 
Yeh Akhari Alvida na ho 
Chahte ankhon se Behti rahi 
Yeh Akhari Alvida naa ho

hm rahe na rahe...!!!

today"s day means 13 nov was a day of sad demise. actually  tommorw our sessionals just got over so whole lot of us go to pubs to drink  n party n dance.we njoy to d fullest bt who knows d person standing jst beside us will die jst after few hours .the same thing happened a friend of varun n saurav met an accident n died.they all went to beach to party n when they were coming ack in an auto then suddenly an drunken bastard truck driven jst crashed wid dat auto...varun died on d spot while saurav after few hours left us..!!varun as far i knw was a chilled guy  .he was frm bombay..his father n mother came n  tuk d body with them to bombay n same in case of saurav also.i dnt understand why god do this to people which our good?.they had whole life lying infront of dem..hope dey  R.I.P FOREVER...!!!!! WE WILL MISS U GUYZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ...(((


                                                  i become very much senti wen i knw sum has died who is related to me by any way.most of dem dnt knw dat i  also lost my elder brother .the whole scene is created in mah mind of d day wen my brother tuk his last breath in mah arms..at age of 14 i faced dis ...s whenever i come to know about sumone death ...i jst become very sad n cry!!   so guyz live happily n carefully as dere is sum one fr everyony who lves u a lot...!!!! bye ...                                                                   

can i quit..?????

Publish Post

dis i a question which i everyday i ask to my self.....hey dis doesn"t mean dat  am putting end to mah lyf ...i "m talking about to put end to all memories of her...it is now enugh now i can"t live by keeping her memories ...i want flush it off...den also dis bullshit love fever comes in mah chupa mind ..i keep thinking of her..dere not even a single day i dnt think off her....jst now i was seeing her pics ..n remembering d comments which i gave to her ..she alwayz sed to ask me..."how is she luking in dis pic" n i used to tell her sum or d awkard answer. i want u guyz answew mah quest ..i have in mah mind since then wen r relationship ended.."is break up is easy for gals?" as i am facing so much of difficulty... i am crying for her..jst i jst regret why i abused her ? .dis is d only thing i regret ...for dis whateever she will say i will do..

be alwayzzz u r..not wat others wanted u to be.!!!!

haa...today is 6 nov 2011...i love to write bt i "m so lazy sumtym even in mah laptop i dnt want to open mah blog....d tym is now in 2"o clock of morning...i jst watched a movie ...u all guyz had ignored dat movie bt i find it assum ....d movie is pyar ka punchanama....yaarr....what a good movi it was...i found it very true..!!dere r 3 guyz in dat movie n dey all get gals  n haan one of guyz name was also rajat...it seemed all guyz whose name is rajat have an experience of break up. so dey all got into relation wid gals...bt at last wat a nuisance a gal can do in ur lyf..!!d guy whose name was rajat...his gal alwayz fight with him on useless topics...dat remind me of mine gal.she alse created a full havoc in mah lyf...she alwayz counter attack on me even i have specific reason...dan also at d end she is d winner.i didn"t lyk any al bt i jst once praised"tmhe to kritika [pasand hai jao uske pass.....apni behan  se kaho wo tmhari setting kareygi..!!" n many more u have to talk for atleast 3 hours in nyt...u cant use facebook...even i took d word facebook frm my mouth dan be ready to listen lecture of 2 hours frm her..."tm facebook par bandiya dhundte ho...." n many more.....n  .One day an astrologer came to my house n said  i will get an punjabi gal  frm dat dey she was shouting on me "tmhe toh punjabi ladki chahiye mere sath to kuch nahi hoga..!!Sometym i felt lyk break up wid her but after 2 dayz widout talking to her i cant live in mah lyf happily...sumtym listening to her voice was d best thing for me...!! imiss her a lot even today..n will ,iss her forever ...!!BUT D BLOODY LYF say to move on..!!S he have got a bf in her college n she will be happy dere ..she deserve better bt i will alwayz feel guilty of myself..i showed mah dat nature which i am not..!! I am simple guy jst want to build up mah drems dan to construct path to fullfill then .....n haan i want to do everybull shit thing in mah lyf...jst leaving sumof them jst as drugs n all...!!from last monday when i took dat imperial blue...i got my stomach into trouble...today i feeling better...!!!!!!!!!!!!

thank u mah sis...!!

.......hey all frnz of mine...dn"t mind if i am not not showing my blog to u as i want to share dis to with for whom i "m writing dis blog frist..!! title of dis blog is quite awkard bt it is d day i frist tym ever listen to sur voice..!i rembr d day it was 24 march 2008 jst after d hectic boards exam of 10.i went to my chachi house after d boards ...she lives jst a km from mah house.when i went my sis her name is monika .she was talking to her frnz....when i went dere...chachi called her...so she kept d phone on hold.gave d reciever to me...i  jst  in eagerness..said hello...she thought i was monika bro shubam...i told her dat i was her cousin...she said okk...dat tym i was soo studious dat i alwayz use to ask  d matter related to studies..!! i ask her..hw were her boards.."...she said.."they went good" n she is expecting 90+ percentage."dis was a short conversation with her...till mah sis banged der n took d phone away."...den i ask to give her no. n she gaved me..!! i msg her n call her..i was behaving lyk i got a gf...i forgot ab to papad belna chalu hua hai agey agey dekho hota hain kya..!!

my love for ever!!!!

love hurts...!!!!

n now i have completed d best novel of mine.....revolution 2020..d best thing dat i can say abt dat novel is i can relate some part of it...or atleast half part to mine lyf...!!d end of lovel...i didn"t lyk at all...i can say gopal was a nerd...as he donated his love...bt d question he asked to him...is he a good human?...someday in our lyf we all do useless things...or we dnt want to do but it happens by sum or d other reason...!!i lost my lady..in my short lyf...bt dis is fine..if she want to go ..she can..bt our relation is full of abusing languages..sometym i fell to say sorry to her...bt she said so filthy wrds to me n mah family...d one thing i dnt lyk n she alwayz say dat is abt my luks...i dnt knw why...if she didn"t lyked me an why she was with me...is she really loved me ??  even after so much of disturbance in our relationship i cant forget her...i awayz try mah level best..to forget her bt dis is impossible fr me....some people say dat "time" is d tablet which keep u to forget everything...bt today is 30 october....n last tym i talked to her...was when i came back frm noida....last tym she said to me"rajat,hm log khatm karte hain...aur ab se ladai nahi karenge"...i thought she was jstkidding to me...so i didn"t give damn shit to her statement..n said"muje nahi rehna tmhare sath....."...........................................i know now how it feels when sumone whum u lov is nt urs nymore...!!

the last word sorry__

        "  sorry"  fot the last tym to sumone whum i luved...will luv always .she's is better tham me the word she said a day before and i am a useless hurt me...))..she now left me with a question taht no lover will ever want this quest to raise in his mind that.."is her partner really luved her??"" but no matter...lyf moves on i only wish she will get a well deserved guy for herself whom she will really luv...n they really make a good pair....))                                                                         

tough tym_

mah lyf is going on unsounded path...where i am ignoring people or u can say d better word people are ignoring me...))..i always a guy who dream big ...but dreams are shattered...lyk leaves are shattered in autumn. i didn"t  ever can forget in lyf the face reaction of mah mother when i told my engg.. exam results...i couldn"t face that face in mah dream also.             

yaa...now..i am writing dis blog for sumone special to me...i mean who is close to my heart...bt frankly speaking i love her a lot,bt mah lyf is not supporting me..to give him more love n show her how much i miss her or love her..))...she is  thinking dat i lyk or look another gals..)) i promise to her dat she is the one whom i love frever))...hope she will understand mah feelings a day...!!!!!!but dis bloody tym never waits for nyone...))